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             A little more than 50 years ago Dale Carnegie authored a book that made him a very wealthy man. The title of it is “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” It  has since been published in every major language of the world and has sold multiplied millions of copies. The popularity of the book lies in the fact that it recognized and deals with a very real human need – that is the necessity to relate to other people.

          Of course, Dale Carnegie was not the first to recognize that need. Jesus was dealing with the same subject more than nineteen centuries ago. The gospels are very practical on how to get along with people. Jesus knew better that anyone else that this can be an awkward thing to do.

        He had problems with His family. There was a time when they thought He had taken leave of his senses, and they tried to persuade Him to leave His work and come back home.

        He had problems with the synagogue. This was the organized religion of His day He tried to fit in and  participate, but finally they branded Him a heretic and ostracized Him.

        All of this is not to say that Jesus was a misfit. It is simply to say that He knew the importance and understood the difficulty of interpersonal relationships. They are not easy. Sometimes they ae impossible. Jesus would never sacrifice principle in the interest of social tranquility, and neither should we. But He does give us some insight about how to have a good relationship with people.

        If someone has done you wrong, Jesus says we should go to them and talk about it, just between the two of you. Do not brood about it, or complain to someone else about it, but go to offending party and talk to him or her about it. In other words, keep the lines of communication open. If you do that, there is hope that your conflict can be resolved.

       The Book of Jesus says, “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger.” What that means is do not store up your resentment. If a friend or brother or loved one has hurt you, go to him or her, bring it out in the open, talk about it. You can resolve it right there, just between the two of you. Keep the lines of communication open.

       Jesus also said that if personal discussion does not resolve the difference, we should bring in a third party. What that means is that we should call in a counsellor. We need to listen to an objective third party. It could be that you are not entirely right about the matter. The problem is your attitude instead of your loved one’s actions. Do not discount that possibility. You must be honest with yourself as well as honest with him or her, otherwise a real relationship is impossible.

       How do you have a good relationship with people? Work at it. Communicate with them openly and honestly. Leave the door always open.